The Mock Turtle Tearoom - Brighton

As excited as I was to visit the famous Blackbird Tearoom and the others I have been to on my trip today, this particular tearoom, tucked away on a little street just off the sea front, made me especially excited not because if its delicious tea but because of its name! When I think of the Mock Turtle from Alice in Wonderland, two portrayals spring to mind: Gene Wilder’s adorable rendition of ‘beautiful soup’ (the words to which I can still remember even though I haven’t watched it in years) and the strange bovine/turtle cross from America Mcgee’s ‘Alice: Madness. So I was just a little disappointed to come in the tearoom and find no turtle references at all, let alone nods to Alice in Wonderland (unless the café’s blue-green colour scheme is a really subtle reference… probably not.) However, this tearoom is the oldest in Brighton and looks amazing for its age!

What I did find was a café positively covered in willow pattern! Old style, new style, some with Japanese characters on them, on the walls, the tables, holding the (separated) white and brown sugar and even hanging from the celling in the window. Behind me there is even a shelving unit boasting twenty-nine willow pattern or willow pattern style teapots beautifully displayed. Even the menu imitates the blue and white pattering around its edges.

After having had a cake, a toasted muffin and a meringue already today I didn’t really feel like eating anything from the bake-sale-esque table of cling-film-wrapped cakes, doughnuts and muffins in the window but the tea I had (The Mock Turtle Blend – a lovely breakfast tea) was really nice and even came with an extra jug of hot water, a sure sign of a pot of tea expected to please. Almost as if to make up for it though, I was given a really small, low jug of milk and they charged ten pence to top it up! Needless to say, I’m not overjoyed about that but the tea is reasonably priced, so I suppose its alright. The waitresses are very smiley and relaxed here, after the black and white uniformed ladies of Blackbird Tearoom and The Little Tea Shop in the Lanes, my waitress here, in a ‘Levis’ t-shirt is a stark contrast!

The mis-matched teapots and milk and water jugs look a little strange next to all the willow pattern but they also bring a homely feel along with the cling-film-wrapped cakes and relaxed and friendly staff, the combination of which creates a lovely, relaxed atmosphere (if only the waitress would stop popping her head around the corner right in front of my table, I’m sure she’s just checking this section of the room but it feels like she watching me!)

Not the place to be if you are looking for Alice in Wonderland references but lovely tea and tasty (looking) food makes it a good place to visit for lunch, worth a visit if you are in the area!

Address: 4 Pool Valley, Brighton, BN1 1NJ